Christmas letter 2024

 Hi friends 

A little late as usual but happy New Year to you all .

We are both looking forward to a Christmas break in a weeks’ time.  It has been a busy year.  Work has been relatively normal. Brett started the year with a party for being minister at Taradale for 25 years, and We finished the Year with a party for David and Vincent’s wedding (Mid November actually). In between we have replaced our kitchen, had a deck built, remodelled the gardens and much more around the house.  Most of the pain was in paying the bills, but Brett moved 3 tonnes of topsoil and re-sowed all the front grass (which is looking great except the soil was weed infested.)  All this work goes alongside getting the section subdivided and plans drawn up for a new house for our retirement. We hope to have the plans by mid Jan and the house finished in a year’s time.

Speaking of pains in the back. Sue has had a rough 3 months with her back.  She had a really enjoyable day planting hundreds of trees in a community project but has been in agony since.  Multiple trips to the Physio have barely made a difference.  It is 42 years since her back surgery, and she has managed it well until now but this pain is draining. It also meant she didn’t take the drive to Gisborne for James 4^th birthday in October.  She enjoys her job at EIT but is counting down till she can retire (over a year away.)

David’s wedding was a small affair in their garden with a few relatives and friends and Vincent’s mother, aunt and friend from Vietnam. It was a lovely occasion, and you could see they really care for each other.   David and Vincent come to dinner most weeks and Sue and David walk the dogs together a couple of times a week.  It is great having them 500 meters away.  David continues working from home as an accountant and he is now the church treasurer.  Vincent sells cars for Turners and is very successful.

We get to Gisborne occasionally, and the family there are doing well. James is a lovely boy (I am not biased at all) and Paul and Mary are awesome parents. Paul changed his job recently and is no longer the head chef which takes some pressure off. He also gets Sunday mornings off now so has started taking James to church which is thrilling.

Other notable events for the year seem to blend into a blur as I type this, so I guess it was the usual round of leading the church, loving the family and enjoying life with all its ups and downs.

Christmas letter 2023

 

Brett and Sue Walker nwes from 2023

 

What a year 2023 has been.

 HB had a wet summer which finally got worse with cyclone Gabrielle on Feb `14^th.  We evacuated our house as it was near the river but thankfully the stop banks near us held and we could return about 4pm and slept in our own bed- there was no power or phone coverage for about a week which made it an extend camping holiday.  I took our camper van down at the church each night to boil water for people and cook on the church BBQs as many people had no gas cookers.  It created a nice sense of community for a few days.

 EIT had lots of water through the ground floor buildings but not Sue’s office nor the Flats she manages for EIT- so other than sweeping some mud from driveways and garages we got off lightly.  2 family’s from the church had water and mud through their houses and are not back in their houses yet.   They are both insured so it is just time and work.  Various churches around NZ gave us over $30000 to provide relief for families in the community which was nice and we shared it out as well as we could to families and lovelink who bought beds and a rural chaplaincy service.  EIT rented 3 or 4 of our rooms at Church for classes for the next 6 months – which mad the place a hive of activity and helped the church finances.

Another momentous event for us this year was selling our house and buying another.  We have gone from 6 bedrooms to 4 (3 plus an office) and only have john boarding with us, he has been with us for about 10 years. The place we bought has over 1000 sqm. (1/4 acre) and our intention is to subdivide and build a retirement size house on the section. I miss the old house with its park views but there was maintenance issues that were coming due and with 2 stories it was going to be difficult and costly.  It took a few months to sell the house with lots of expensive dramas along the way.  Currently the new house has lots of maintenance and lots of gardening so at least temporarily it feels worse but the long term aim needs to be kept in mind. We were so pleased when the house sold we didn’t have 2 mortgages and 2 lots of lawns and gardens to do.

Funnily enough David also decided to sell his house and moved into one end of King Street (No. 20) and we are at the other end (5 minutes’ walk away.)  David has been with his partner Vincent for 3 years now and got engaged this year. He still works as an accountant/ bookkeeper from home and Vincent now sells cars for Turners.  We have a new dog called Ginny an SPA special (about 6 years – mostly fox terrier) and they also have a Rescue  dog – a big dog called Key so Sue and David and the 2 dogs do many walks together.

Paul is still in Gisborne and we get up there when we can.  He is now the head chef at the vineyard restaurant (the Vines) where he has been for several years.  James turned 3 in October and is a lovely kid.  Paul and Mary are great parents.  They were down in HB for Christmas so that was wonderful.

Work:  HB Presbyterian churches have had several ministers retire in the past year or 2 so I am providing oversight for one church and helping them seek a new minster.  We have also so had several meetings about churches cooperating or merging as some of the other churches are not financially sustainable for long term.  We have seen some good growth in our young adults groups and the worship has appreciated some new skills of pianist and guitarists.  Sue’s job had 2 parts, 2 days looking after EIT flats and 3 days with e EIT facilities dept.  This second part was a temporary contract and she had to apply for her job which she was successful at thankfully but it means she will give up her flats work

which was he remaining contact with international students which she has enjoyed so much over the years.  Covid saw a huge drop in international students but the numbers are way up last year and next year esp. at the postgraduate level.

The rest of the year seemed to pass by quickly enough.  The coming month has a few momentous dates.  On Jan 14^th we will have been married for 40 years.  On the 16^th Jan Brett will turn 63 and on the 29^th he will have been minister at ST Columba’s for 25 years.

On Thursday before New Year we head off to Nelson for a week’s holiday.  Sue’s mother went in to a rest home earlier this year so we are driving down and will bring back a few mementos from her house. She turned 95 this year so is doing pretty well.  Sue gets 2 weeks holiday and Brett 3 so he will be doing some house painting if it is not too hot.

 

We do hope you had a good year and blessed Christmas. Best wishes for 2024

 

Brett and Sue

 

 

Slow down to lead with Integrity  EHS Study 8  Put the big rocks in first

Most of us are starved for time, over scheduled  and preoccupied. Few of us have time to enjoy Jesus, our spouses, our children, or life itself, let alone the gift of leading/serving others. We think, "The space I need for replenishing my soul and relaxing can happen later.'' There is simply too much to be done.

Slowing down to lead with integrity is a counter-cultural act of rebellion in our world today. Yet, focusing on the integrity of our relationship with God, ourselves, our spouses, and our leadership is the greatest gift we can give those around us.

 

Starter

1.            We began this journey into emotionally healthy spirituality by looking beneath the surface and realizing how our "iceberg" shapes the ways we relate to and react to people and situations in our daily lives. What has been your biggest realization, your biggest "aha!" moment, in your walk with Jesus Christ in these past seven studies?

2.            Looking back, you might now see the "cracks" that should have alerted you that all was not well. Have you experienced or observed any of these possible warning signs in yourself? Check the ones that apply.

 "Spotting the Cracks" List

____     Serving others as a chore, a duty, a burden, instead of a joy

____     Neglecting my inner life with God

____     Seeing people as obstacles rather than gifts

____     Feeling overextended and overworked

____     Constantly serving, doing, and giving, with very little receiving, enjoying, and relaxing

____     Feeling guilty about taking time off for healthy self-care

____     Living spiritually dry and empty

____     Putting out fire after never-ending fire-a crisis-to-crisis lifestyle

____     Lacking the space and time to fulfill commitments and promises

____     Living with a spouse who is lonely or depressed

____     Experiencing an inability to leave work unfinished

____     Denying my problems in front of others

____     Becoming defensive when others criticize or make suggestions to me

____     Pretending not to be resentful, depressed, or angry with someone

____     Feeling isolated from people and disappointed

____     Being unable to let people honestly know what is going on inside me

 

Can you identify with any of the "cracks" above? describe one such experience.

 

STUDY       
4.            Read 1 Timothy 4:7-16. Timothy had been thrust into a position of responsible Christian leadership far beyond his natural capacity. He was young (probably 30-35 years old), prone to illness, shy, and reluctant to lead. Yet he found himself thrust into the responsibility of combating false teachers and bringing order to the church in Ephesus. Paul knows the key to the future of the church centers around Timothy's integrity.

You have probably heard the story of the teacher who wanted to demonstrate time management by filling  glass full of rocks then asking "is the glass full?", then they putting in pebbles, then sand then water asking if it was full each time. Then reversed it by filling it first with sand – there was no room for the big rocks and the moral of the story is put the big rocks (your priorities) in first.  According to our reading what are the big rocks?

 

In verse 7, Paul calls Timothy to "train himself" to be godly.

In what ways is our life with Jesus Christ similar to an athlete training for an Olympic event?

How is this relevant to our discussion today?

5.            Paul gives Timothy a string of commands in verses 11 - 16 that culminate in verses 15 and 16: "Be diligent in these matters; give yourself wholly to them, so that everyone may see your progress. Watch your life and doctrine closely. Persevere in them, because if you do, you will save both yourself and your hearers." How do you hear those words for you today?

  6.          What might be the implications for others if you do, or do not, slow down your life in order to allow Christ to deeply transform you?

 

 Exercises

This diagram provides an illustration of our spiritual life where our activities (e.g., our doing) are out of balance with our contemplative life (e.g., our inner life with Jesus). 

 

Your Contemplation

your activities

 

7.            Using two circles , draw your own diagram to illustrate how your activities (i.e., your doing) balances with your contemplative life (i.e., your being with God).  DO the exercise a second time where you show how you would like it to be.

 

 

 

What challenges keep you from:               I

-                      slowing down your life to be with God?

-                      slowing down your life to care for yourself in a healthy manner as Jesus did (e.g., practicing Sabbath, sleeping adequately, ruthlessly eliminating hurry)?

-                      slowing down your life to be with your spouse and/or family in a way that honours God?

-                      slowing down to have integrity in the way you lead others (e.g., being thoughtful with your words, resolving conflicts biblically, remaining aware of God's presence at work)?

 

8 What might be one or two simple decisions you can take towards slowing down in one of the above areas?

 

Finally

Take a few minutes and pray together about what God has said to you during this study.

 

Going further

■             Arrange a movie night with your small group to watch The Apostle. Invite people to share how they related to Sonny's life, and what they did or did not appreciate about him.

 

I trust you can see by now that you have begun a lifelong process that will transform you, your relationship with God, and your relationships with others. Working through this material is challenging, requiring a death to our ingrained destructive behaviors and reactions, and forcing us, in new ways, to explore the truth that will set us free. Nonetheless the fruit is enormously rewarding and rich - beyond anything you can imagine.

 

WHERE DO YOU GO FROM HERE?

Consider these next steps:

1.            See our website, www.emotionallyhealthy.org,to keep abreast of future conferences, retreats, and materials.

2.            Sign up for the mailing list for pastors/leaders who continue to be part of this growing movement of leaders committed to integrating emotional health and spirituality. (See above­ mentioned website.)

3.            Listen to sermons and teachings related to the integration of emotional health and contemplative spirituality so that you can continue to do your own theological and personal work.

4.            Read reflectively Emotionally Healthy Spirituality (Nelson,2006) and Begin the Journey with the Daily Office (Barrington, IL: Willow Creek Publishing, 2009).